It’s often hard for me to think about what to write next.
I’m not someone who can just pick a random topic and write about it. I mean I can. Hell, I did it for three years at uni and got HDs erryday (hollllaaaaa), but it’s never my most authentic work. My best writing generally stems from something that has lit a fire in my chest; that’s made something burn deep in my belly; that sets my anxiety into overdrive or my emotions into gear.
And I’ll be honest – it’s terrifying every time I press post. “What if it’s not interesting enough or funny enough or what if people think I’m an obnoxious dickhead and unfollow or unlike my pages?” My blog, my social media outlets, my writing … these are the things I am working on each and every day. What if people are mean to me … [insert pathetic crying face here]. Which can, and has, happened. The negativity feels like little stabs in my blogging heart.
But fuck the haters. Not that I’m cool enough to have haters, but ya’ll get what I’m saying. I could be dead tomorrow and I’m sick of not doing what I want to do out of fear. So I’m going to keep posting about whatever grinds my gears, makes me happy, sad, worked up, grateful … or whatever I feel like complaining about to you wonderful people who actually read these posts.
Case in point –
Lately, I’ve been in a bit of a rut with the fitness and health aspect of my life. Which is ironic considering I am a part-time personal trainer, and generally, a massive healthy-eating advocate. You know how many times I trained last week? Once. Yep. Numero uno. Granted I did pull a muscle in my arm/shoulder due to not warming up properly (I am an idiot – folks, do as I say not as I do), but still. Even if I hadn’t pulled that muscle I probably wouldn’t have trained that much. I haven’t felt my usual gusto and enthusiasm to train for awhile now, and I put it down to three things:
a) I’m burning out ever so slightly due to working two jobs, long days and also trying to have a social life.
b) I’m being a whiny bitch.
c) All of the above.
Hmmm. What could the answer possibly be? ¯_(ツ)_/¯ (It’s c, the answer is c). So with that in mind and with me being absolutely sick of the sound of my own incessant whining, I am posting this and sharing my goals to keep myself accountable. Yep. Being one of those people. Again – FTH (fuck the haters).
I am giving myself exactly eight weeks to get to a better place physically and mentally, to make some positive changes – details of which I will share as I go, and will share my specific goals in the next few days.
First steps to be actioned tomorrow:
- Join a gym close to my work so I can include heavy gym training with my favourite F45 sessions. Girl needs to grow her booty.
- Do a killer booty session at said gym.
#getaroundit (say like M. Vigus)